


The Clean Up Crew

by Metaphorical_Tables



Category: Supernatural
Genre: (not literally), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, And Other Hunters, Baby Tricksters (sorta), Because Someone Needs To Clean Up After The Winchesters, Cheesy One Liners, Death, Drama, Dramatic Reveal, Dubious Morality, Gabriel Being Gabriel, Gen, Gratuitous Use Of In-Show Dialogue, Hacking, Illegal Emancipation, Illegal Purchase of Weapons, Judgment, Mentions of Suicide, Morality, Murder, Nonbinary Character, Peer Pressure, Public Transportation, Scheming, Stabbing, Swearing, They Can't Drive, Vague Mentions of Emotional Abuse in Chapter 1, but for a good reason, eventually, probably, vengeance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-18
Updated: 2018-02-07
Packaged: 2019-02-03 19:02:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12754308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Metaphorical_Tables/pseuds/Metaphorical_Tables
Summary: “I think, since we have knowledge of this stuff thanks to Alex,” said Anth, wanting to actually say what was running through their minds, “But we aren’t actually fit enough to fight monsters regularly, we should just… clean up the mess.”“Like, just, follow hunters through towns and help survivors, and make sure they didn’t miss anything?” Audrey said, sounding more excited than incredulous.“Like…” said Alex, “A clean-up crew.”





	1. God Damn It

It started, as many of these things do, with a death decidedly unnatural in nature. Of all the things to go wrong, the foster home they had been sent to was haunted. An actual, genuine haunted house with a real dead person in it, soon to be joined by more of it’s own making.

The ghost was a suicide, a girl who had been pushed over the brink by bullies at the local high school. That was 10 years ago though, and she had already successfully taken out all of her specific tormentors. One would think that would mean she would be ready to move on. However, she had been twisted by her need for revenge, and was now targeting anyone she saw as a bully. This led to several deaths, and the house passing through different hands very quickly. It also led to her discovery by hunters.

The hunters came, burned her, and went. There was only one casualty; the woman who owned the house. Apparently, she was emotionally abusive to the children she fostered. The hunters considered it a job well done; the only victim wasn’t a good person anyway, and the spook was gone. They never even considered the foster kids. Luckily, the kids in question were unusually resilient, and had an advantage over the average bystander to the supernatural.

“Man, hearin' ghosts are real and actually witnessin' it are two completely different things.” Audrey swept up bits of plates that the ghost had flung.

“I know.” Alex picked up the larger pieces of porcelain and put them in the garbage bag he was holding. “It doesn’t really hit you until you see it yourself, does it.”

Anth hummed contemplatively, causing the other two to lookup from their cleaning. “Those hunters.”

“Yeah?” Alex said.

“They got rid of the ghost, but…” Anth tapped the computer bag on their lap. “They didn’t really do much else.”

“What d'ya mean, exactly?” Audrey said, leaning on the broom.

“Well, if Alex hadn’t had prior knowledge of the supernatural, we’d be pretty freaked out, right?” Anth paused, and then spread their hands. “But, they didn’t even stop to, I dunno, make sure we didn’t think we were crazy. They just sorta- left.”

“That,” said Alex, “Is an excellent point, and if you’re going where I think you’re going with this, then I’m totally in.”

“I think, since we have knowledge of this stuff thanks to Alex,” said Anth, wanting to actually say what was running through their minds, “But we aren’t actually fit enough to fight monsters regularly, we should just… clean up the mess.”

“Like, just, follow hunters through towns and help survivors, and make sure they didn’t miss anythin'?” Audrey said, sounding more excited than incredulous.

“Like…” said Alex, “A clean-up crew.”  
______________________________

It didn’t take long after that to get everything in order. Anth was an accomplished hacker, and got them unenrolled in public high school, and enrolled in online school. They also instantly emancipated the three of them. After that, they simply had to get supplies.

Alex, being the oldest and most experienced, played the young adult buying guns and other weapons from less than reputable sources. Audrey got the other supplies, like a first aid kit, and fashioned various accessories with symbols to protect them. They figured that if they needed any other supplies, they could get them on a case-by-case basis.

The only problem left was the issue of transportation.

“So… Do any of us know how to drive?”

The only answer to Audrey’s question was silence.

“I guess we’re takin' the bus.”


	2. Not Exactly

Being the clean up crew was an interesting experience. The fact that they had to take the bus everywhere was annoying. Buses don’t go everywhere, so they ended up doing a lot of walking. Talking to the survivors of supernatural encounters made it worth it though. They even managed to set up a group chat for the people they helped.

The group chat was a bit more complicated than a simple chat room, and was really more of a community, but the point still stands. Surviving victims of the things that go bump in the night could commiserate with each other, and even find others and add them. The best part was, the whole thing was set up to look like a role play. So, even if a person ignorant to the existence of monsters somehow (even though it’s invite only) found it, they wouldn’t think the community members were crazy.

Even though most of their job was helping the victims, the clean up crew did occasionally have to get rid of a leftover monster. This didn’t happen often, since most hunters are thorough to a fault, but it happened occasionally. Whenever there was a supernatural creature that got missed, they first studied it from afar. This was both to make sure it was actually evil, and to figure out how to make a trap for it.

You see, three teenagers, one of which is under five feet and one of which has no weapons experience, really couldn’t take on a super strong, super fast, and possibly magically inclined being, even if they ganged up on it. Sure, they might get lucky, but they weren’t actually hunters. So, they set traps.

The traps varied from time to time, but the basic formula was to trap the thing in sigils and then kill it either remotely or very, very carefully. They still got injured on occasion, but since they weren’t actively hunting, it didn’t happen often.

On one of the rare cases with a leftover monster, the Djinn in question woke up before they could kill it. Luckily, they were nothing if not thorough, and he was chained up. But, that didn’t stop him from talking.

“What,” he said, “They let kids be hunters now?”

“Not exactly.” Alex stabbed the Djinn with the lamb-blood-covered knife. “We’re just here to clean up.”

“Wow, we’re doing cheesy one-liners now?” 

“Shut up, Anth.”  
_________________________________________

The hunting community is not well connected. However, that isn’t to say that rumors didn’t get around. Quite the opposite, actually. For a group of people who spent more time lying and killing things than actually socializing, hunter gossip got around extremely fast. As such, everyone had heard the rumors of a strange new group of hunters.

They were a group of three, though for some reason no one could seem to agree on what they looked like, and the most unusual thing about them was that they didn’t seem to take their own cases. No, instead, they went in after other hunters, and typed up loose ends. No one called them. They just showed up and… helped.

The strangest thing, though, was that anyone who had actually bothered to ask would say that they said they weren’t hunters. Even though they killed monsters and helped people, they denied being hunters.

And so, rumor of the “Clean Up Crew” started circulating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter canon characters will start showing up. Can you guess who will be first?


	3. Tall Tales and White Lies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here comes dat boi

They caught wind of a case at a college in Springfield, Ohio. A professor went out a window, a college kid got “probed” by “aliens,” and a scientist got eaten by sewer alligators. It looked like hunters had come to town, and, judging by the fact that they were clearly no longer here, killed the monster. From what they could tell, it was a pair of hunters fairly well-known in the supernatural community. They and their father (who, apparently, was dead now???) were said to be very thorough in their monster killing, so they focused mostly on the victims, and less on looking for missed monsters.

They talked to the college kid who got “probed” and ultimately decided that he was a dick, and that he hadn’t seen anything actually magical in nature. In time, he’d probably decide he had a bad drug trip, or something. Being forced to slow dance with aliens and nearly being killed by a homicidal dead person were on two completely different levels.

They were checking for more witnesses by observing behavior, when they started to notice that the janitor was odd in a completely different capacity than they were looking for.

“I’m pretty sure he’s the one the hunters came for.” Alex looked up from the footage Anth had “procured” for him. “Probably a trickster, if I had to guess.”

“How the hell do two famously effective hunters miss killin’ the only monster in town?” said Audrey, hands in the “boi, you a boutta get roasted” position.

“That’s part of why I think he’s a trickster.” Alex gestured to Anth’s computer. “The other reasons are the sewer alligator, and the candy he never seems to stop eating.”

“Yup.” Anth stole their computer back and started to flick through video. “His pockets are endless voids of pure sugar. His teeth would be awful if he were human, but they aren’t, so…”

“I can’t believe the cincher of our theory is fuckin’ dental hygiene.” Audrey leaned back in her chair. “So, judgin’ time?”

“Judging time,” Alex confirmed.

They (mostly Anth) began to research the victims, to determine if they had truly deserved it, like the lore suggested, or if they’d have to play exterminator.

“Alright,” Anth said, “So the professor nosedive was a creepy adulterous bastard, probe kid, as we already knew, is a dick, and alligator science man experimented on animals.”

“I think murder is generally a bit much in response to cheating,” said Alex, “but then again, alligators in the sewer.”

“Alligators in the sewer,” agreed Anth and Audrey simultaneously.

“Wait, I’m confused,” said the Trickster, suddenly appearing in the room “so you’re not going to try to kill me?” 

Alex and Audrey fell off their chairs, with shouts of “Jesus Christ” and “What the fuck” respectively.

Anth, meanwhile, swiveled in their chair, throwing a knife they had up their sleeve at the man.

“Well,” he said, removing the knife, which had lodged in his shoulder, “that was a little rude, and also didn’t answer my question.”

“I think that suddenly appearing next to someone is more rude,” said Alex, still lying on the floor, “and no, we aren’t going to try to kill you.”

“I’m reconsiderin’ that,” Audrey muttered.

“Well, that’s a novel idea,” said the Trickster, who suddenly had a lollipop, and ignored Audrey’s comment entirely, “Hunters with standards. I didn’t think murder was pardonable, regardless of motivation.”

“Well,” said Audrey, standing up and dusting herself off, “we are both not hunters, and of the opinion that there are worse things than death.”

“Not hunters?” The Trickster took the sucker out of his mouth, used it to count them, then seemed to come to a realization. “You wouldn’t happen to be that ‘clean up crew’ I’ve heard rumors about, would you?”

“He’s heard of us,” Audrey snarked, “I’m flattered.”

“Don’t be rude,” said Anth, who had gone back to looking at their computer at some point.

“You literally stabbed him, but I’m not allowed to be sarcastic?”

Anth shrugged. “Point.”

“What are you even doing?” Alex leaned over, looking at the screen. “Oh. Well. That's- not what I expected.”

“What?” said Audrey, the only one out of the loop.

“They’re playing Galaga.” Alex turned to look directly at Anth. “Did you seriously just throw a knife at our magical intruder, then start playing Galaga? Honestly I’m- I’m not even sure if I’m surprised at this point.”

“Welp,” said the Trickster, interrupting their conversation before it could get any farther, “I’ve decided I like you kids. I’m gonna hang out with you for a while.”

The three teens made eye contact, before speaking in unison. “Can you drive?”

“What?”

“None of us can drive,” said Alex, “So we have to ride the bus a lot. So if you can drive, that’d solve a lot of problems.”

“Wait- Well, I mean- I can drive, but-” The Trickster paused, looking at them incredulously. “None of you are gonna question or protest what I just said? You’re just gonna… roll with it?”

“We’re millennials,” said Anth, as if that explained everything.

“... Okie dokie then,” said the Trickster, sounding bewildered, disappointed, and vaguely impressed.

Silence enveloped the room for around a minute and a half. Lots of awkward shuffling happened.

“I’m Loki, by the way.” The Trickster- Loki finally broke the silence.

“Wow,” said Alex, deadpan, “I can’t believe I’m taller than the norse god of chaos.”  
__________________________________________________

After Loki joined them, things were different. For one, they actually had a car, and could drive directly to places. For another, they saw places other than hunter battlefields. Loki stopped some places to deliver his just desserts to assholes. Increasingly often, the kids would offer suggestions, and soon they were sort of apprentices. Loki still couldn’t really pinpoint when that had happened. One minute, they were just throwing out suggestions like an occasionally helpful comments section, and the next they were actively helping him.

The reverse happened, as well. At first, Loki just would tell them a random helpful fact or hint every so often. At some point, though, he began getting involved in the work, actually helping, and even fighting a couple truly evil monsters.

He had a feeling that this was either going to end extremely well, or very, very badly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh shit waddup


	4. Groundhog Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're slowly integrating with the actual show...

The rumors in the hunting community of a three-man “clean up crew” evolved into four. Around that time, though, was when another rumor, of a trickster with three apprentices, started circulating. It was scarce, just a few hunters here and there, but there were whispers that the oldest of the strange group of hunters was far older than he looked, and that maybe, they really weren’t hunters at all. Maybe, they were monsters themselves.

Of course, as with any conspiracy theory, it was very polarizing. Eventually, there were two groups; the larger one, who thought the idea was ridiculous and mostly just didn’t care; and the smaller, die-hard-believer group.

The die-hard-believers of course, as is with hunters, tried to solve the problem with lots of stabbing. It took 23 tries before they finally realised that it really wasn’t working. 15 pairs or single hunters came back to proclaim that they had succeeded, and the group was dead! Only for the quartet to show up again, somewhere else. The first 6 or so of these were ashamed for not doing their job right, and the rest were ashamed that they thought they could do any better.

7 of the hunter pairs/singles lost the tricksters before coming even remotely close to them. It was heavily debated if this was more or less frustrating than killing them, only to find out they weren’t really dead.

The last one just straight up couldn’t find them. He’d go to a town they were rumored to be in, find people who had seen them, and evidence of their residency. But not once did he actually spot them. He looked for a week, always just one to many steps behind them, before they vanished again.  
_________________

Dexter Hasselback was an arrogant son of a bitch. 

“I really don’t like him.” Alex stood with his hands in his pockets, watching their target with the rest of the group.

“Yeah, but…” Audrey scrolled through illegally obtained information on the man in question. “He’s got a daughter.”

“She’s a grown-ass woman,” said Loki, “She can handle herself. Plus, who’d want to be related to that?”

Anth swallowed the bite of chocolate they’d been munching on. “Four of the tourist traps he’s debunked went bankrupt, and two of the owners have committed suicide.”

Silence reigned as the three teens looked at each other. They each nodded, before speaking in unison while turning to face Loki. “Just Desserts.”

“Hells yeah,” he said, “Let’s make it spooky, people. Irony rules.”

They all turned to Anth, who had already got their computer up and running.

“So, what’s the theme of this trap?”  
____________

_Oh shit _, thought Anth as they spotted the new arrivals they had felt enter the town. “Hey Loki, your favorite hunters are here.”__

____

____

“Oh man,” said Audrey, leaning over to look at the screen of Anth’s laptop, “We should totally mess with ‘em.”

“I’ve been meaning to teach Sammy there a specific lesson,” said Loki, uncharacteristically serious, “Deano’s gonna die in a few months, and we don’t need a Winchester in a downward spiral once that happens. Sam’s gotta get over it.”

“So what we’ve got to do is hammer home that Dean’s going to die, and that there’s nothing he can do about it,” said Alex, “The most effective way to do that would be to just kill Dean. Seeing is believing, and all that.”

“I don’t want to kill him for real.” Loki continued, ignoring the slightly shocked look that gained him, “There’s nothing we can do to stop him from going to hell, but I’d rather we didn’t send him early. The side effects would be… unpleasant.”

“And now I’m imaginin’ a Winchester demon,” said Audrey from her position on the floor, “thanks for that.”

“Well, we could just make it look like Dean’s dead,” said Anth, “but him not being dead would ruin the point of the lesson.”

“So we need to make sure Sam knows he can’t save Dean.” Loki gestured with his lollipop. “But I won’t kill him, so… any ideas, kiddos?”

Silence stretched, before Alex spoke up. “Ever seen Groundhog Day?”


	5. Mystery Spot

“Jeez,” said Loki, “I’m running out of ideas. I never thought I’d run out of ways to kill someone.”

“You already did the shower thing, right?” Alex said, sprawled out on the couch of the house they had ‘appropriated.’

“Yup.”

“Hmm. How ‘bout…” Audrey waved her arms, “the dog.”

“Alrighty, dog mauling coming right up.”  
______  
“Ah, fuck,” said Anth looking at Loki’s disguised form from the seat the three occupied.

“What?” Alex glanced from their face, to Loki, to the Winchesters, and then back to Anth.

“He switched syrups.” Anth grimaced a bit.

“Maybe they won’t notice?” Audrey, watching the hunters in question. They seemed absorbed in the computer in front of them.

Loki got up and walked out of the diner. Sam’s eyes flicked from his plate to him as he walked by the window.

Audrey put down the cup she was she was drinking from. “I think he noticed.”

Alex sighed and buried his face in his hands as the day reset again.  
__________  
“You’d have to be a trickster,” said Sam, holding a stake to a disguised Loki’s throat.

“Mister, my name is Ed Coleman, my wife's name is Amelia, I got three kids,” Loki said, voice quivering just for good measure, “for crying out loud I sell ad space-”

“Don't lie to me!” said Sam, “I know what you are! We've killed one of your kind before!”

Loki smirked. “Actually, bucko,” he said, finally breaking character and shifting back to his usual form, “You didn’t.”

“Why are you doing this?” Sam asked.

“You're joking, right?” Loki said, incredulous, “You chuckleheads tried to kill me last time. Why wouldn't I do this?”

“And Hasselback, what about him?” Dean butted in.

“That putz? He said he didn't believe in wormholes, so I dropped him in one.” Loki laughed. “Then you guys showed up. I made you the second you hit town.”

“So this is fun for you? Killing Dean over and over again?”

“One, yes. It is fun.” Loki said, voice low, “And two? This is so not about killing Dean. This joke is on you, Sam. Watching your brother die, every day? Forever?”

Sam swallowed. “You son of a bitch.”

“How long will it take you to realize? You can't save your brother. No matter what.”

“Oh yeah? I kill you, this all ends now.” Sam pressed the stake harder into Loki’s neck.

“Oh-oh, hey, whoa!” said Loki, a note of nervousness entering his voice, “Okay. Look. I was just playing around. You can't take a joke, fine. You're out of it. Tomorrow, you'll wake up and it'll be Wednesday. I swear.”

“You're lying.”

“If I am, you know where to find me.” Loki shook his head slightly. “Having pancakes at the diner.”

Sam paused, before reaching a decision. “No. Easier to just kill you.”

“Sorry, kiddo. Can't have that.” Loki snapped his fingers.  
_______

“You’re an idiot.” Alex sighed, a hand loosely over his eyes.

“Shut up,” Loki said, “I was bored, Sam’s just insanely observant. And anyway, this clearly wasn’t working. I’m gonna have to up the ante.”

“What do you have in mind?” Alex said, a little apprehensive.

“This time, he’s going to stay dead.”

Alex paused before replying. “For how long?”

Loki grinned, “Until Sammy accepts it, or he finds me again.”

“Oh thank god,” said Audrey, a hand over her heart, “I thought he was bein’ inconsistent again.”

“What?” said Alex, puzzled.

“Well, y’know, Sammy-boyo figured him out because he deviated from the script,” Anth said, picking up on Audrey’s train of thought.

“Yeah,” continued Audrey from Anth’s start, “and since he was super fuckin’ gung-ho about not killin’ Dean for real-”

“Gung-ho?!” Loki said, offended.

“- I was sorta worried somethin’ else would go wrong, since he sounded like he was reconsiderin’ it.”

Anth nodded. “Nothing good comes from Loki being flighty.”

“Flighty?!” Said Loki, one hand on his chest.

Alex lightly smacked Loki on the head. “Shut up, they’re right and you know it.”  
_______

“Why do you care so much about Sam?” asked Alex one day after checking in on said Winchester on Loki’s magic TV, “And don’t give me any bull about the alternative being inconvenient. I know you. This is more personal.”

Loki laughed, a short, sheepish thing. “You got me kiddo. I dunno, I guess…”

He looked at the TV, which showed Sam’s face, cold, hard, and desperate. “He just… reminds me of how my brother was.”  
_____

“Aw man,” said Audrey, as the group watched Sam fish a bullet out of his shoulder, “At this point I just feel bad for him.”

The three kids looked at Loki.

“Hm.” Loki avoided eye contact by looking at the screen. “Hmmmm.”

The kid’s stares grew more intense with each passing second. If he were human, Loki would’ve started sweating.

“mmmmmMMMMMM- FINE!” Loki threw up his hands. “I’ll throw the kid a bone!” He manipulated Sam’s phone, adding the second voicemail. “But just this once!”  
________

“Bobby? Bobby! Bobby!”

_Okay, that’s just cruel_. Alex thought at Loki.

_Shut up_ , replied Loki the same way, _the fact that he’s freaking out means he wasn’t completely sure Bobby was a fake. So, a bit of punishment._

Loki vanished “Bobby”’s corpse, and appeared before the distraught Winchester, summoning the bloody stake into his hand. “You're right. I was just screwing with you.” He gestured at Sam with the stake. “Pretty good, though, Sam. Smart. Let me tell you, whoever said Dean was the dysfunctional one has never seen you with a sharp object in your hands. Holy Full Metal Jacket!”

“Bring him back,” Said Sam, his tone soft and pleading.

“Who, Dean? Didn't my girl send you flowers? Dean's dead.” Loki said in a bouncy, sing-song tone, “He ain't coming back. His soul's downstairs doing the hellfire rumba as we speak.”

“Just take us back to that Tuesday- er, Wednesday- when it all started.” Sam’s voice was tired and sad. “Please. We won't come after you, I swear.”

“You swear.” Loki repeated mockingly.

_Aw geez, he looks like a kicked puppy_ , Audrey thought into the mental group chat.

“Yes.” said Sam, dead serious.

“I don't know. Even if I could-”

“You can.”

“True. But that don't mean I should.” Loki’s voice suddenly lost it’s teasing edge. “Sam, there's a lesson here that I've been trying to drill into that freakish Cro-Magnon skull of yours.”

“Lesson? What lesson?” Sam asked, honestly confused.

_All that trouble, and you gotta go the direct route in the end._ Audrey thought at the rest of them, _Winchesters are stubborn as hell._

“This obsession to save Dean? The way you two keep sacrificing yourselves for each other? Nothing good comes out of it! Just blood and pain.” Loki then lowered his voice. “Dean's your weakness. And the bad guys know it, too. It's gonna be the death of you, Sam. Sometimes you just gotta let people go.”

“He's my brother.” The only reason the Winchesters seemed to need.

“Yup,” said Loki matter-of-factly, “And like it or not, this is what life's gonna be like without him.”

“Please.” Sam looked like he was about to cry. “Just- please.”

_He’s not even angry._ Said Anth through the mental link.

_Is this depression, bargaining, or denial?_ Asked Audrey rhetorically.

Loki took a breath, and then gave up. “I swear, it's like talking to a brick wall. Okay, look. This all stopped being fun months ago. You're Travis Bickle in a skirt, pal. I'm over it.”

“Meaning what?” Sam asked, caught between terror of living without Dean any longer, and tentative hope.

“Meaning that's for me to know and you to find out.” Loki snapped his fingers, resetting the world back to that fateful Wednesday.  
_________  
They stuck to mostly clean-up-crew jobs for a while after that. The just desserts they did serve out were unquestionably deserved. They were slowly making their way back to the more questionable morality scale when the news came. Dean was dead.

“We did all we could,” said Loki, “Now all we can do is hope it was enough.”


	6. There's Angels Now, Apparently

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the kids get learned a thing or two, and someone still escapes.

Sometimes, Hunters would show up to a town with mysterious disappearances, and there’d be no monsters.

Sometimes, the hunters would take care of the problem, regardless of species.

Sometimes they wouldn’t.

Those times were when clean-ups and just desserts overlapped. This was one such time.

They were in New Jersey (which was in and of itself a tragedy) and some people had gone missing. All the victims were in the same apartment building, and had similar appearances- short, blonde, and under fifteen. No sign of a forced entry, no signs of a struggle, and nothing on any security tapes.

When they arrived, hunters were still investigating. Naturally, the crew decided to shadow them, since it’d be easier to tell who’d need help if they saw them. The hunters researched, asked around, investigated. Finally, they came to a conclusion.

It was a human. The owner of the building. He had a master key, and fucked up sexual preferences.

The hunters decided that it wasn’t their problem.

The crew went full-trickster. The man woke up one morning down two legs and with blonde hair, all his victims who still lived at the police station, painting a vivid picture of who kidnapped them, how, and most importantly, why.

The hunters had an unfortunate encounter with a human smuggling ring. After a few days, every other captive was rescued by a mysterious 4 person team. When the hunters asked desperately why they weren’t released as well, the group replied that they weren’t their problem.

Luckily for the hunters, the police busted the whole ring a few weeks later.  
___________

One day, a burst of power rippled through the world. Over the next few days, word got around.

_Dean Winchester is no longer dead._

Loki filled the kids in on a thing or two.

“Angels?” said Alex, raising an eyebrow.

“Yup. They’re pretty much dicks.”

Alex nodded. “Alright.”

“You’re all very calm about this,” Loki said, “No existential crises or anything.”

“Well, if demons are real, it’s not too far of a stretch to assume angels are real, too.” Anth twirled an upwards-pointed finger. “That’s actually what most people would do.”

“And if sort-of-huntin’ has taught us anything,” Audrey said, a sardonic note in her voice, “it’s that you can’t always trust the lore.”

“Well,” Loki said, “Alrighty then.”  
_____________

They’re in Carthage, Missouri when they run into a woman named Michelle Montgomery, who’s husband was a rugaru. She quietly confesses to them that her husband killed and ate a man who had attacked her and held her hostage. They explain to her about rugarus, and give her the web address of the survivor community. There’s not much else they can do.

They run into a woman who was kidnapped by “Dracula,” a few teenagers who got locked in a crypt with zombies and ghouls, a whole town where people’s wishes came true, a magician who’s best friend was a real witch, and a town where for a while people just… didn’t die before they come to a realization.

“Loki,” Alex said cordially from the back seat, “Are we following the Winchesters around?”

“Well, at first I was seeking them out, ‘cuz I sorta, maybe, wanted to check in on them?” Loki said sheepishly, before continuing on with a note of genuine confusion in his voice, “But I stopped doing that after the first two or three. It’s been like, six.”

“If the next one we find was also the Winchesters, I’m going to be a little concerned,” said Anth.

Ironically, they didn’t run into any Winchester-related cases for a while after that. They did, however, find a little second-hand bookshop with an… interesting series in it.

“Supernatural?” said Audrey flipping the book to look at the back, “ _Along a lonely California highway, a mysterious Woman in White lures men to their deaths… a terrifying phenomenon that may be Sam and Dean’s first clue to their father’s whereabouts._ Is this accurate?”

“Hey look,” said Anth, picking up a different book, “Mystery Spot.”

They flipped through the book, skimming through the parts with their trickster chaperone.

“We are not mentioned at all.” Anth flipped through the last few pages. “Just the Winchesters and Lokes.”

“I wonder if any hunters know this series exists,” Alex said, clearly amused, “I wonder if _Sam and Dean_ know about this.”

“Who knows?” said Loki.  
__________

They get right back on the Winchester-following-train when they stumble upon Amelia and Claire Novak, who were held hostage by demons because Amelia’s husband Jimmy was an angel vessel.

“Castiel, huh?” Loki said with a sort of wistful amusement, “Interesting.”  
___________

Another burst of power rolls across the world a few days later.

“Oh no…” Loki’s face would have gone white if he were human. “Oh no, no, no. Sammy. Tell me you didn’t.”

“What?” Alex asked, apprehensive.

“The last seal has been broken.” Loki turned to look at them. “Lucifer’s free.”

“ _Oh_ ,” Anth whispered.

“I- I need-” Loki stuttered, “I need to- to tell you guys something.”

“Yeah?” Audrey said.

“So…” Loki fidgeted a bit. “I wasn’t… originally called Loki…”

Alex sighed. “You’re an angel, aren’t you.”

“How’d you-” Loki stopped. “Actually I’m not entirely surprised,” he muttered, “I should know better than to expect anything approaching a normal reaction from you kiddos.”

“Yeah, you weren’t exactly subtle,” said Anth, scrolling through the kid’s ‘proof Loki is actually an angel’ Word document, “and also you’re way too powerful to be just a trickster.”

“So?” said Audrey, her voice teasing, “Which one are you?”

Loki smirked a bit. “They call me Gabriel.”

Instead of the silence Loki- Gabriel expected, he was treated with an immediate response.

“Wow,” said Alex, deadpan, “I can’t believe I’m taller than the actual archangel Gabriel.”

“My true form is roughly the size of mars,” said Gabriel, pointing a finger at Alex, “So shut up.”  
_______

“Ah.” Gabriel suddenly said later that day. “That’s either a good sign or a really bad one.”

“Are you ever gonna just tell us when something relevant happens, or are you gonna make us ask every time?” Audrey said, annoyed.

“I will never give up the chance to be dramatic.” Gabriel put a hand to his chest, as if offended anyone could ever even _think_ that. “And to answer your sort-of question, I can’t find the Winchesters anymore. They’re warded.”

“Wow, that’s got to be some heavy duty warding.” Alex squinted a bit. “There’s still other ways to track them, though.”

“Yeah, like the car, or…” Audrey trailed off, trying to think of more tracking methods. “Actually it’s mostly just the car.”

“Yeah, it’s a pretty sweet ride,” said Gabriel, “but it’s noticeable. Unique. Terrible for any kind of work that requires no one knowing who you are.”

“Like being a trickster,” deadpanned Alex, “Or hunting.”

“I’m amazed they ain’t been spotted yet.” said Audrey, “By the police or the FBI or even just monsters that don’t like ‘em.”

“Maybe everyone who hasn’t really met them thinks they’re smart enough to use a different car?” Alex suggested weakly.

“Nah,” said Anth, “the Winchesters are known for that Impala almost as much as they are for being forces of nature.”

“How has the law not caught on that they ain’t really dead?!” Audrey’s face scrunched up in exasperation.

“Luck, probably,” said Gabriel, “or maybe Fate’s actively helping them, for once.”


End file.
